When I was thirteen years old, I decided to volunteer in my local Oxfam charity shop. Back in the 1990s, this was not a cool move. Charity shops weren't yet popular enough to be trendy and shopping in one was something you only did if you had no money or style - at least in the eyes of my circle of school friends.My conscience insisted I did something good for the world, though, and so I started working in the shop on a Saturday. All my friends would be in town but thankfully when I stood at the till, I couldn't be seen from the street. However, if ever a customer wanted something from the window, I would have to crawl onto the platform and retrieve it, making myself entirely visible to all passers-by on the High Street. I have a distinct memory of clammy hands and prayers that nobody I knew would be walking past. When you're already a geeky teenager trying hard to play it cool, that kind of exposure doesn't help.
I shop in charity shops all the time now and yet when a friend told me she'd got her wedding dress from Oxfam, it felt like a step too far. Although intellectually I thought it was a fantastic idea, my 'inner teen' responded with horror and anxiety. It's interesting to notice how we're affected by our earlier experiences, especially when they happen in our formative years.
Thankfully, I bypassed the prejudices and did buy my most perfect wedding dress from Oxfam. We went to the store in Poole, Dorset where they have a separate floor dedicated to bridal wear. The experience was hugely enjoyable and I felt every bit as special as a bride could feel. The assistants had previous experience in conventional bridal shops and so could advise on styles that most suited me and on any necessary alterations. I was also surprised to discover that the dresses are generally not pre-worn, but rather donated by designers who have showcased the gowns in fashion shows or magazine shoots. My dress cost £200, which I was told would buy a school room in a developing country. Good for me, good for others - certainly worth doing things differently.
Do Things Differently
What action are you desperate to take, but which feels that little bit 'uncool'? Cartwheels in the street, telling someone your religion, 'fessing up to an unusual hobby on your website? What version of you are you longing to be, but it's a little away from what's considered 'normal'? Perhaps you have an idea for a venture but it feels a bit geeky and you don't want to come across as an idiot as you pitch it to the bank manager or speak about it in public? Notice what you miss out on by caring too much about what's cool and what's not.
(c) Corrina Gordon-Barnes, 2008
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